Humorous timber sale names

Mike Hagen mhagen at
Wed Aug 5 18:55:39 EST 1998

That's part of the culture that made the old FS special even with all
its warts.  The sale name was the one shot of the lowly to commemorate
some aspect of their work on a sale. Where I worked, whoever did the
recon got to name the sale, but if he was a good sport, he'd let the
crew name some too. Cutting targets came down from ON High, and those
on the ground could do or die. Dry understatement was preferred unless
something was really too bad for words.

What Timber Sale Officer could play too hardball on dangerous sales
such as FUBAR or Diarrhea. Both had snotty downhill yarding sections
and nearly blind leads.  The steepness of Vertical I, and its adjacent
salvage offspring, Cliffhanger and Fresh Air come to mind.  The 200
mile international view from Scenic, a helicopter salvage first, then
a burn, then a salvage, then a slide; will be long remembered. The
cries of the oppressed come back in Career Change.  Traverse crews
were driven to the edge (and cracked) at Disco Slug.  Huckleberry
season lasted all year for the TSOs on Bluestain, Bluebeard and Purple
Puss (which offended the secretaries and so was renamed, Mauve Mug).
Certain staffers obsessions and shortcomings became painfully obvious:
endless variations involving the word "Elk" or "Lost" or "Lunch."  

You really had to have been there.

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