Pentium Jokes...

Jason L. Buberel jbuberel at uiuc.edu
Wed Nov 30 18:26:42 EST 1994


Q&A:  THE PENTIUM FDIV BUG

Q:  How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  1.99904274017, but that's close enough for non-technical people.

Q:  What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a  research grant?
A:  A mad scientist.

Q:  What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on
    Pentiums?
A:  The warning label.

Q:  What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium?
A:  Successive approximations.

Q:  Complete the following word analogy:  Add is to Subtract as Multiply
    is to:
        1)  Divide
        2)  ROUND
        3)  RANDOM
        4)  On a Pentium, all of the above
A:  Number 4.

Q:  What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider?
A:  "Life is like a box of chocolates." (Source: F. Gump of Intel)

Q:  Why didn't Intel call the Pentium the 586?
A:  Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got
    585.999983605.

Q:  According to Intel, the Pentium conforms to the IEEE standards 754
    and 854 for floating point arithmetic.  If you fly in aircraft
    designed using a Pentium, what is the correct pronunciation of "IEEE"?
A:  Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!


TOP TEN NEW INTEL SLOGANS FOR THE PENTIUM
 - --------------------------------------------------------------------------

  9.9999973251   It's a FLAW, Dammit, not a Bug
  8.9999163362   It's Close Enough, We Say So
  7.9999414610   Nearly 300 Correct Opcodes
  6.9999831538   You Don't Need to Know What's Inside
  5.9999835137   Redefining the PC -- and Mathematics As Well
  4.9999999021   We Fixed It, Really
  3.9998245917   Division Considered Harmful
  2.9991523619   Why Do You Think They Call It *Floating* Point?
  1.9999103517   We're Looking for a Few Good Flaws
  0.9999999998   The Errata Inside




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