UNITED STATES DISTRICT
DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA CIRCUIT
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
WE, THE AMERICAN PEOPLE
Criminal Action No. 98-0117
SUBPOENA TO TESTIFY AND TO PRODUCE DOCUMENTS AND/OR OBJECTS
To: We, the American People
You, and each of you, are hereby commanded to appear in the United States
District Court for the District of Columbia Circuit, in the city of
Washington, District of Columbia, on the 1st day of October, 1998, at 9:00
A.M., to testify in the case of United States v. We, the American People,
regarding, without limitation, any and all SEXUAL ACTIVITIES you have engaged
in and/or witnessed within the past three  years of the date herein, and
to bring with you any and all BOOKS, MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS, NECKTIES, CREDIT
CARD RECORDS, RESTAURANT BILLS, THEATRE TICKETS, HOTEL/MOTEL BILLS, MEDICAL
RECORDS, VIDEOTAPES, AUDIOTAPES, COMPUTER STORAGE MEDIA, etc., purchased
and/or received within the past three  years of the date herein.
Please take notice that failure to appear and/or answer personal,
private sexual questions truthfully and completely, and/or produce personal
papers and effects at such date and time, are gounds for criminal prosecution
for contempt and/or perjury, nothwithstanding that that 22-year-old ADULT
WOMAN's, Monica Lewinski's, CONSENSUAL oral sex with the President in
Washington, D.C., in 1996-97, is neither relevant nor material to Paula Jones'
alleged non-consensual sexual harassment in Arkansas seven  years ago. See
Fed.R.Evi. 401 and 18 U.S.C. §§ 1621-1623.
Please take further notice that the unethical and extramarital affairs of
Republicans Newt Gingrich, Henry Hyde, Dan 'scumbag' Burton, or Helen
Chenoweth are not a defense as they are neither relevant nor material to your
personal, private, sexual affairs and/or your job performance.
This Subpoena is issued on application of the United States of America, by
Kenneth W. Starr, Independent Counsel.
Dated: September 22, 1998
/s/ Nancy Mayer-Whittinaton
Nancy Mayer-Whittinaton, Esq., Clerk of Court
United States District Courthouse
Third Street & Constitution Avenue N.W.
Washington, D.C. 20001
In article <6tvl3u$mm9$1 at news-2.news.gte.net>,
"Peter Smith" <pjsmith1 at gte.net> wrote:
> We are people interested in microbiology, not ...
> the IQ of the man who simply did his job.
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