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Little Johnny came home early from school and started calling his mother
with no answer. He finally went up stairs and saw the bedroom door was open
a little. When he peered in, he saw his dad on the bed with the maid so he
quietly went outside and waited for his mother. When she showed up with some
groceries, he said "Mommy, Mommy guess what I saw? I saw daddy upstairs on
the bed with the maid and they were......." and his Mother said, "Stop right
there, Johnny". Wait until supper tonight when the maid is serving the meal.
When I wink at you, then tell me the story." At supper when all were seated
and being served by the maid, she winked and Johnny began again. "Mommy,
When I got home from school early today, I was looking for you and saw daddy
on the bed with the maid. They were doing the same thing that I saw you and
Uncle Phil doing at the cottage last summer."
A businessman entered a tavern, sat down at the bar, and ordered a double
martini on the rocks. After he finished the drink, he peeked inside his
shirt pocket, then he ordered another double martini. After he finished that
one, he again peeked inside his shirt pocket and ordered another double
martini. Finally, the bartender said, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis
all night long. But you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket
before you order a refill." The customer replied, "I'm peeking at a photo of
my wife. When she starts to look good, then I know it's time to go home."
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