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Three guys are convicted of a very serious crime, and they're all sentenced
to twenty years in solitary confinement. They're each allowed one thing to
bring into the cell with them. The first guy asks for a big stack of books.
The second guy asks for his wife. And the third guy asks for two hundred
cartons of cigarettes. At the end of the twenty years, they open up the
first guy's cell . He comes out and says, "I studied so hard. I'm so bright
now, I could be a lawyer. It was terrific." They open up the second guy's
door. He comes out with his wife , and they've got five new kids. He says.
"It was the greatest thing of my life. My wife and I have never been so
close. I have a beautiful new family. I love i t." They open up the third
guy's door, and he's slapping at his pockets, going "Anybody got a match?"
The wedding date was set and the groom's three pals, a carpenter, an
electrician, and a dentist, were deciding what pranks to play on the couple
on their wedding night.The carpenter decided that he would saw the slats off
their bed. The electrician figured that wiring the bed with alternating
current would give them a few chuckles. The dentist would not tell the
others what he had done, and wore a sly grin, simply suggesting that his gag
would be a memorable one. The wedding and reception went as planned. A few
days later, each of the groom's three friends received a letter which read
as follows. Dear friends, We didn't mind the bed slats being sawed. The
electric shock was only a minor setback. But, I swear to God Almighty, I'm
going to kill the idiot who put Novocain in the K-Y Jelly.
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