micro mods to neurons

kenneth paul collins KPCollins at postoffice.worldnet.att.net
Fri Oct 11 16:31:45 EST 1996

Stephan Anagnostaras wrote:
> Yeah, why not try:
> alt.support.I.need.lithium.lots.of.it

Stephan, that's not it... I'm just "hard-pressed"... lost my 
employment... my funds are running out... the weight I've carried 
for 25 years is crushing... and it's an exceedingly-sorrowful 
thing to have witnessed my total abandonment...

...if the unemployment folks don't see fit, I'll have to trash 25 
years of dedicated work... not because I want to, but because I 
simply will not be able to pay for a room in which to house it... 

...so folks are "put off" because I "rage against the night" of 
Ignorance in which savagery is the rule... in which the Children 
are ravaged...?

...what am I supposed to be...? for 25 years, I've given over the 
stuff that one "normally" uses to nurture one's self to the 
development of Duality Theory... in light of that, what am I 
supposed to be...? am I supposed to witness what I try to 
communicate twisted into lies, and not beconvulsed in the agony 
of what I know such means... it means that, for still more time, 
the slaughter that is ameliorated by "Duality Theory's" 
understanding will continue... am I supposed to remain "cool" in 
the midst of such...?

...I'm sorry, perhaps I could pull such off, but I'm filled with 
loathing at the thought of doing so... in this matter, 
folks' willingness to forsake Truth is the one thing with respect 
to which there is nothing I can do, other than just not joining 
in such... I will not... and if I must "groan" a bit in public 
because it's so difficult, these days, to not abandon Truth, then 
I'll "groan" a bit... I'll do what's necessary not to cave in 
under the pressure to conform to "the way things are supposed to 


...you know, Stephan, if it comes to hauling my research 
materials off to the dumpster, there'll be some "relief" in that 
for me... I won't have to feel that I've got to continue trying 
to gain a hearing for the understanding because, if folks've 
refused to allow the work to be published when I've had all the 
necessary documentation prepared for them, how will I be able to 
expect folks to not refuse after all of the documentation's been 
trashed...? it's kind of sad though, if the materials have to be 
dumped, that will constitute something that's in the same league 
as Hitler's and Mao's book burnings... only something a bit 
more-precious than all of the stuff contained in those books will 
have been trashed...

...so, forgive me if I =do= mourn a bit... and forgive me if, 
every now and then after having witnessed awesome savagery, I 
=do= stand and look Ignorance squarely in the eye and bare my 
heart a bit... some days are more-sorrowful than others...

BTW, it's my analysis that you are not in Psych at UCLA... you 
might be in LA, but you're neither "in" Psych nor "at" UCLA... 
either of these requires other than that which you've presented 
to us... don't they...? ken
People hate because they fear, and they fear because
they do not understand, and they do not understand 
because hating is less work than understanding.

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