My work in Physics

Kenneth 'pawl' Collins k.p.collins at
Thu Jan 2 23:10:27 EST 2003

On the new[er] stuff gaining sway... it's 'funny' how it happened.
I was racing along the 'line' I'd mapped, when my neighbor's new
PC arrived. He'd asked me to help him get it set up, and so I
turned off my PC, and went to help out.

When I returned home, I found that the interval [about four hours]
had broken my concentration - I couldn't get back into the 'race'
[ part of this was that I'd been working around the clock,
sleeping only when exhausted because my $ had run out - I use such
Life-Threatening periods to allow TD E/I to elevate strongly, and
get-to-work in the midst of that [don't try it unless you're
fully-comfortable with NDT's understanding - it's a conscious
venturing into the "zone of randomness" [AoK, Ap4], and it's not
good to 'go' in-there without understanding what'll transpire]. I
learned back during the 'Terrible times' that these periods of
intense problem-solving effort are inherently 'fragile', and I
guard their 'connectivity' scrupulously, allowing no trivial
'distraction' - but, it's part of the 'other Life' I Live, that
others don't comprehend what's at stake, so, when my neighbor was
in need of assistance, I put down my work to lend it [they've been
feeding me, after all - I'd've 'gone under' a while back if it
weren't for them] but,  in the interval of relative quiet away
from the 'battle-line', the greater exhaustion to set in].

When you work like this, you're holding a =lot= in short-term
memory - and, in the accumulated exhaustion,  the line I was
working just 'evaporated'.

I was 'heart'-broken.

Unable to work, I sat down to catch up on my snail-mail writing -
giving myself a 'hug' by writing to Love.

And while I was writing that letter, the new-new stuff just
'barged-right-in' :-]

It's so amazing. If my neighbor's new PC hadn't arrived, I'm sure
I'd still be fleshing out the line on which I was working.

If I'd not reached-out to Love, in the ensuing interval, the
new-new stuff wouldn't've gained sway [I'd've 'fought' to 'hold
the line', and I'd've 'succeeded', 'cause I'm fierce in thet way.

But it'd've been a failure 'secret' to me, 'cause the new-new
stuff wouldn't've had a chance to 'break-through'.

It's so Amazing when stuff like this happens.

And to top it off, against my protests, my neighbor insisted on
giving me $40 for helping him [because he said that it'd've cost
him $130 to have the vendor's folks come in].

So the $40 will give me two weeks more Life, and the attending
sense of relief also contributed to my being able to say, "OK,
I'll rest by writing to Love", which allowed the new-new stuff
'daylight' within the TD E/I I was carrying :-]

It's just so Amazing when something like this happens.

There I was, 'bulling' my way through the problem... and, in the
quiet of my exhaustion, 'the butterfly flapped its wings' -
altering all of History.

Anyway, I mis-spoke in my last post. I don't just "believe I've
been able to explain how every so-called [Sorry] 'particle' gains
its observable qualities - even while [they] remain[...]
continuous with all other energy", I know, with Certainty, that I

Still, I'm esperiencing some 'trepidation'... no one's gotten back
to me re. the simple Compton-scattering stuff. The newer stuff is
not inherently 'difficult, but, be-cause it's a still-greater
divergence from that which has been familiar to folks who do
Physics [and folks who do other Science, but don't 'move away
from' Physics] - and NDT dispassionately discloses what'll
transpire... yet more 'silence'.

But I've nothing left with which to live through the term of the

Anyway, this's the stuff with which I'm dealing... in case it

I don't know if I can endure more 'silence, just now.

You know?

ken [k. p. collins]

"P. S. ..."

Kenneth 'pawl' Collins wrote in message ...
|The 'exuberance' I've expressed recently derived in a
|in the stuff I'm working on. It's 'funny' how that happens - one
|works and works, and as one does, one gains a 'sense' of the fact
|that the principles one is carrying-through are getting
|'long-in-the-tooth' - yet one cannot see their replacement yet -
|it just builds like a nebulous 'nagging' that, increasingly,
|one out of one's concentration with respect to the
|'getting-long-in-the-tooth' stuff and then, Wham! the
|'replacement' barges right in :-]
|It always leaves me 'floored' - all jaw-hanging-down-ness. [If
|folks give AoK, Ap7 a careful read, they'll find that the
|'mechanism' underpinning these dynamics is described in-there. It
|all reduces to TD E/I. The "nebulous 'nagging' that,
|lifts one out of one's concentration" is 'just' a
|"meta-sensory-dominant prefrontal constellation" as such is
|discussed in AoK, Ap7. The 'transition' of which I write didn't
|happen only during this period of intense focus. Everything I was
|working to commuincate via the little apps I've posted was more
|than a decade old. I last worked intensely on it back in the late
|1980s and early 1990s. So it was a 'delight' to find that, even
|though I wasn't paying a lot of 'attention' to it, my nervous
|system was, nevertheless, sorting it out. My recent intense
|just brought the TD E/I dynamics to a 'showdown', and the new-new
|stuff carried sway - I'm still 'high' from it - like in the aside
|[footenote 158 for folks who've paper copies] in AoK, Ap7 -
|True Colors - experiencing True reward.]
|Anyway, I've only got a little 'time' left before I have to give
|up my Inet account [if nothing breaks for me, Permanently], and
|because the stuff that I've newly-converged upon requires that I
|begin-at-the-beginning again [lest my work become a confused, and
|confusing,'hodge-podge' of the old [that was new to Physics] and
|the new [still newer to Physics]], I'll not be able to do all I
|wanted to do before I've got to give up my Inet account.
|The remaining Inet 'time' I've left is Precious to me, so,
|of posting code, I'll just discuss what would be in the code if I
|had the 'time' to communicate in via program code. [BTW, I had an
|insight into myself while doing the "Compton scattering" apps.
|With respect to 'spelling'. It is that I spend so much 'time'
|coding in environments in which every 'word' that actually
|is rigorously-defined, and coersed by the compiler, that one
|doesn't have to be concerned with 'spelling' - in fact, in
|programming, no analogue of 'spelling' exists - one either
|gets-it-right, in terms of the programming language's syntax, or
|the program doesn't run - no 'grey-scale - and this ramifies in
|prose :-]
|Anyway, I've got to gear-down a bit, explore the notebook I've
|kept during my recent effort, and gather the 'Jewels', then I'll
|discuss them - I believe I've been able to explain how every
|so-called [Sorry] 'particle' gains its observable qualities -
|while it remains continuous with all other energy.
|It's Beautiful.
|K. P. Collins
|"P. S..."

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