An 'easily'-removed Stumbling Block to Peace

KP_PC k.p.collins at worldnet.att.net
Fri Nov 7 21:56:05 EST 2003


"Powell Praises Informal Peace Negotiators in Mideast
By GREG MYRE

Published: November 7, 2003"

http://www.nytimes.com/2003/11/07/international/middleeast/07CND-MIDE.html?hp

Looking back upon previous efforts to achieve Peace in the Middle East, one 'stumbling block' routinely shows itself.

It is that, since folks've been remaining in relative-isolation from one another, any attempt to come-together to discuss the necessities inherent in achieving Peace falls victim to the short-term relative 'unfamiliarity' of people with one another and within the interactive dynamics of the negotiating setting.

This 'stumbling block' is 'easily' removed.

Just use NDT's understanding to know, beforehand, that, for the short-term, initially, things are probably going to degenerate into more 'heat' than 'light'.

Know this beforehand.

And resolve, beforehand, that when things do 'fly off the handle' during the relatively-early phases of negotiation, that happens simply be-cause the nervous systems of all those involved are just experiencing the TD E/I(up) that always accompanies ventures into relative 'unfamiliarity'.

Agree, beforehand, to 'rules' for handling the 'rants' and 'outbursts' that tend to 'pop-up' out of elevated TD E/I 'states'.

Understand, instead of using such behavioral manifestations as 'excuses' for breaking-off negotiations.

When 'outbursts' happen, recognize them for what they are - just indications that nervous systems are, in fact, taking things seriously.

Then, take the rest of the day off, and come back the following day, not with chips on shoulders, but with understanding in your 'hearts'.

As things continue in this way, learning will occur that enables the nervous systems of all those involved to gradually converge upon TD E/I-minimization with respect to the formerly-relatively-'unfamiliar' stuff, and things will, with Certainty, become increasingly-'cordial', at least with respect to this one 'stumbling block'

What's more, the same-stuff also applies to the nuts and bolts of the give and take inherent in the negotiating process overall.

Get 'Familiar' with this or that before deciding with respect to this or that.

You know - agree beforehand, that, whenever something from across the table seems to be too-much, instead of rejecting it out-of-hand, give it 'time' sufficient to become 'familiar' with what it actually is [to achieve TD E/I-minimization with respect to what it actually is]. A good way to address such occurrences is to ask the folks across the table to discuss whatever it is in athe new light that's shed upon it through its being rewritten by person who was not involved in the initial writing of it. Doing this also, of course, provides nervous systems with the 'time' during which TD E/I can decrease and 'familiarity' can increase.

Don't presume you know all that's entailed when the first few words of something that comes across the table are experienced. You don't. What you know is what's 'familiar' [TD E/I-minimized] to you. What you need to know is what's 'familiar' to the folks across the table.

Big-difference.

And understanding with respect to it can make a Big-difference with respect to the prospects for the Peace for which we all long.

K. P. Collins
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