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A notoriously absent-minded professor was one day observed walking along
the street with one foot continually in the gutter, the other on the
pavement.A pupil meeting him said:"Good evening, professor. How are
you?""Well," answered the professor, "I thought I was all right when I left
home, but now I don't know what's the matter with me. I've been limping for
the last half-hour."
A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's. He
noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he
watched, the older gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then
counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of
them. Then the old man poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and
set that in front of his wife. The old man then began to eat, and his wife
sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap. The young man decided to ask
if they would allow him to purchase another meal for them so that they
didn't have to split theirs. The old gentleman said, "Oh, no. We've been
married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared,
50/50." The young man then asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she
replied, "Not yet. It's his turn with the teeth.
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