childbearing in grad school

EVERSL at AXE.HUMBOLDT.EDU EVERSL at AXE.HUMBOLDT.EDU
Thu Nov 10 03:02:44 EST 1994


Melisande,

Whether or not you have a child while in Grad School should not depend on
your advisor, although being on good terms with your advisor may be affected
by taking time off for maternity leave.  More importantly, being a brand-new
parent can be as time-consuming as being a grad student.  Both are totally
selfish activities that should be indulged fully.  How old are you?  If the
biological clock is not running on empty, I would suggest postoponing a
baby for a couple of years.  

I raised 4 kids in College, and it's no picnic...even with a godly, grand-
motherly caregiver (which are not that easy to find and are usually expensive)
The problems that can come up (and will at the most inopportune times) will
curl your hair.  I'm lucky because I have an exceptional mate who not only
washes clothes and cooks meals but doesn't get too upset by my coming in at
10:00, 11:00, 12:00AM.  But infants, especially breastfed infants, are a lot
less tolerant.

Mind you, this is my opinion.  i love babies (thus 4) but if I had to do
it over again, I'd probably do the college first, and the babies later.

Linda Evers
eversl at axe.humboldt.edu



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