baking, etc.

Mr. W.Y. Chan wahchan at
Sun Dec 22 05:14:41 EST 1996

Beth Hacker (bhacker at wrote:

:  Boy, this baking thread applies to me! I love to bake/cook but I am
: finding that I am starting not to bring homemade goodies to lab functions
: even though I am expected to (since I am female). I just got tired of all
: of the guys bringing soda/beer/chips who then sat around and waited for
: the females to bring the "real food". I refuse to supress my love of food
: because of them so I only bake for those who appreciate it. 
Hi Beth, I cannot understand why anyone dont appreciate "real food"
but I assume those who expect you to bring them in would appreciate it,
I am sure if the the guys gets to bring soda/beer/chips and find
the women sitting around waitimg for them to bring these in they would get tired
too. Its seems pretty fair that you are the best cook and they got the muscle
to carry the crates of beer the responsibility are shared dont you think?

:   Another item in recent posting also applies to me and I'm not sure how
: to deal with it. It's about "wasting your potential". I have heard that
: phrase from so many of my professors and I sure bought it. I was only
: supposed to apply to the best grad schools because I would be wasting my
: time and education. So I believed it and did all the right things,followed
: the path that I was supposed to take to get the right job. My current
: advisor feels that it would be beneath me to take any job that wasn't
: either 1) a faculty position at a prestigious university or 2) a very high
: powered biotech position. I still bought into the whole potential thing
: until I realized that I didn't really want either of those two jobs. I
: still want to do science but not for 70 hours a week, no matter how big
: the paycheck is.I'm tired of working to please my advisors,making them
: look good by getting good positions,etc. I'd really like to have a normal
: life-40 hrs a week,weekends off. He doesn't understand that since science
: is his life-to him any alternative would be disgraceful. What his students
: do and where they move on to makes him look good. 
:   So how does one deal with someone like that? What he wants for his
: students is not necessarily what we want but the "wasting your
: potential,you'll regret it, you'll never be happy" is what I will be told
: if I tell him I don't want that kind of job. It is very hard to stick to
: your guns when the person who will be your main reference doesn't support
: your right to chose the life you want to lead. Has anyone else out there
: been in this situation?
I hate it when someone tells you that but the truth is no one is using
their "true potential" otherwise our potential would be limitless, as
Albert Einstein puts it "on average man only use 10% of their mental capacity"
The real answer to this is what do you wants not what other people expect
you to become. Some people dont like taking risk in what they do, but some
take a gamble and do well for themselves but others who gamble also ends
up worse off. My advice is if you are confident in choosing a change in
career you are propably half way there and I still believe the best 
person to understand you is yourself because only you knows what measure
of ability you have.


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