high self-esteem and aggression

[dr._margaret_martens at FTDETRCK-CCMAIL.ARMY.MIL]

     Maybe I'm the ecception that proves the rule, but in my pre-college 
     years I was *not* one of the kids with an attitude.  I was very sedate 
     and timid.  My goal after graduating from high school was to become 
     either a dietican or a home economics teacher (which makes my friends 
     roll on the floor, as I am now known as the "microwave queen").  I 
     grew up in a family with all brothers, but never considered a 
     non-traditional career before college.  Once I started studying 
     biology and chemistry, though, I found I enjoyed it so much that I 
     couldn't imagine doing anything else.  I really began to flower in 
     college.  The assertiveness and self-confidence that I have gained 
     came mainly from a supportive father and the realization that being 
     respected for your knowledge and abilities is more valuable than being 
     admired for being pretty and witty (I never was either of these).  I'm 
     still not aggressive, but I no longer take any crap from anyone.
     
     I think my point is that sometimes we tend to ignore the wallflowers, 
     who may be just the young women that need to be encouraged.  The ones 
     with an attitude (if they don't get themselves into serious trouble 
     first) stand a better chance of succeeding on their own.


______________________________ Reply Separator _________________________________
Subject: Re: high self-esteem and aggression
Author:  quinones at mindspring.com (Cathy Quinones) at Internet-Mail
Date:    2/26/96 21:34

(major snip)
     
One thing I remember from my pre-college years (both elementary and high 
school) is that the girls that ended up becoming scientists, engineers, 
etc... were also the ones that wouldn't take crap from anyone.  We weren't 
afraid to punch someone if he/she deserved it.  We were also the ones that 
hung out with the guys and were treated like equals.  There was another group 
of girls that were much more, shall we say, sedate: they skipped college, or 
got married soon after graduation, and certaintly didn't attempt to go into 
traditionally male occupations (science, engineering).  Of course my sample 
size is rather small, but these differences in *attitude* strike me now.  I 
have to wonder how come some of us took one path and the rest took another, 
at how come these attitude-loaded girls ended up hanging out together... and 
at whether we all just got lucky that we had one another as an example upon 
which to draw so that we didn't feel a need to conform... or if we sort of 
invented ourselves?
     
=========================================================== 
Cathy Quinones   quinones at mindspring.com 
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