Getting Heard

Dorothee Guenzel guenzel at mail.rz.uni-duesseldorf.de
Sun Jan 14 09:36:39 EST 1996


On Sat, 13 Jan 1996 15:59:16 -0800, Linda Kingsbury wrote:
>I have never had this happen to me.  The only thing I can think of to
>suggest is that, when the man repeats your response, immediately speak up
>in your teaching voice, "Yes! That's exactly what I'm saying!" and then
>expand on some point or another.  Question to people who have had this
>experience:  Would this approach work?  Would you be accused of "stealing"
>the man's idea?

I never had it happen to me either, at least not in a discussion group 
etc. But I think I would react exactly as you described: confirm openly, 
that that was exactly what I said.
At least, this is what I hope I would do. I know, that in situations like 
that I can be so astonished, that, for just the important moment, I don't 
know what to say, and then the opportunity is gone.
The only thing that maybe comes close to having my idea "stolen" in the 
way discussed here, happend when I was an undergrad. At the end of our 
undergrad studies we have to do a research project which lasts for about 
one year. During that periond I was discussing some results with my boss 
and he asked me how I would interpret them, and I told him. A few day 
later, when we talked during coffee-brake he said: as I told you recently, 
I would interpret your results such and such... - just what I had said to 
him before. As it was in front of all the others, I just didn't know how 
to respond. It still annoys me today when I think back! But I think that 
this situation was rather typical for behaviour within a hierarchy, not 
because I am female and he is male.

Dorothee
__________________________________________________________________________

Dr. Dorothee Guenzel
Heinrich-Heine-Universitaet
Duesseldorf
Germany



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