How do you handle it?
paris at merck.com
Tue Jul 8 17:02:50 EST 1997
Kimberly Walker wrote:
> I'm looking for information on how to deal with difficult men in your
> How do you all deal with men who remark too much on physical attributes,
> cultural/racial differences, who exhibit racist/sexist behavior and are
> all-around jerks effectively?
I had the very same situation happen when I was working in a formulations
lab in industry. The guy was a sexist pig and would comment on my
appearance every day and then top it off with offensive (I mean really
disgustingly offensive jokes) at the time I was only 24 and didn't know
how to deal with it until I spoke to another woman in another lab down
the hall. She said stick up for yourself and tell him to shut up.
At first I would also recommend the "What do you mean by that" which will
usually get you the answer of " What? Nothing I was only commenting or
making a joke, what's your problem"
This is the point at which to come out and say it "Look you look like a
real jerk by saying the things you say and I don't like it so if you want
to keep on doing it take it somewhere else where shit can be appreciated
cause all it does around here is stink. And if that isn't clear enough
for you then you're so full of it that its shooting out your eyeballs and
that's why you can't see it for what it is. So quit it with the offensive
remarks and if you didn't know they were offensive now you do."
More than likely he'll get the message and lay off if he doesn't don't
even tell him that you'll take it to your boss, just do it, but make sure
you document it first cause it could come down to your word against his.
Put it in your date book or on the computer the stuff that's been really
offensive and show it as evidence if it has to come down to that.
The contents of this message express only the sender's opinion.
This message does not necessarily reflect the policy or views of
my employer, Merck & Co., Inc. All responsibility for the statements
made in this Usenet posting resides solely and completely with the
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