Doing it all over again--Children

Mary Ann Sesma msesma at
Fri Jun 19 14:29:08 EST 1998


There have been  many great comments on this thread. The succinct comments
of  Rae, Chris, and Julia  are profound.  In fact, with permission, I would
like to use these comments for presentation for a group that I mentor.
For the younger group they are benchmarks and road signs.    I hope I can
add another roadsign.   I suspect that I am one of the elder agewise in
this group.  (69)and one who moved into the alternative career field
(science education)   did not finish the Ph.D.  There are a few items to be
added (from my perspective) M y three children are now 39, 41 and 45 and
are well established in their own professional careers. E ldest and I have
a small educational development corporation  for the k-12 public school
sector.   I work actively in "retirement" because I choose to do so not by
financial necessity and I have time to talk with my husband , a

The bio clock does run out--the career clock does not.  The due dates of
grants are announced, the grad students can re run the experiments with
support.  Child rearing does not conform to planning--those little suckers
can create chaos.   This is kismet.   Assess your life, and "get a life" of
your choice.

EX: the eldest came home with a fever at 6 years,  turned into chickenpox.
The incubation clock was working.   The middle one  showed me the little
red pox marks 8 days later: again the clock ticked -the baby got  cp.  Now
the final blow was that 10  days after the baby started that cycle of cp,
husband broke out.    An utter mess.  Three sick kids (they were easy) but
a 40 year old male with chicken pox-(a sight and personality  to match) and
the loss of 20 days of time at work (big deal--we were always broke anyway).

The output of 49 years:  1 marriage which has offered infinite rewards,
because the gentleman is a true partner,  3 daughters ( totally obnoxious
in adolescence but are infinitely wonderful now), 3 grandchildren (I am
glad I do not have to raise them at this point) , 15 mil in educational
grants and evaluations--and more are being written, the chance to move
ahead in  science education--  high school science teaching (28 years),
curriculum writing,   administration, and principalship. 1 BS
(Microbiology)   2 MS (1 microbiology/biochem and 1 education-which was a
total  academic disgrace as I assessed it--only needed it for a license) ,
a DEAD Ph.D, (too late for the research to be relevant-- pregnancies
intervened) start on a Ed.D--gave it up in disgust. . Despite teaching
salaries, we risked everything  and travelled many many times with kids
etc,  even  took 3 kids + 3 ( friends of our kids) around the world for 9
months) camping--That WAS a trip.

 I have had and will continue to have what  I consider to be a life filled
with unplanned events:  valleys  of dispair and peaks of adventure  and
the  scars and accolades  match.

 I would not trade my life for anything.

SO--Carpe diem

Mary Ann Sesma

Mary Ann Sesma                          e mail
1621 Sunnyhill Drive                    msesma at (preferred)
Monterey Park, CA 91754                 sesma at
phone; (213)261-5860

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