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Unusual Child Problem: Pulling hair out

Cijadrachon cijadra at zedat.fu-berlin.de
Wed Apr 7 22:12:10 EST 1999


Played a bit around with one sort I do (but another): If I focus on it
or request a load of hearing data it stops. If I just want to know
what is going on outside via optics, it goes on, and the strain does
not seem to go up as much as when stopping the sequencer doing it.

Once when onlining though the sequencer seemed to be at off-lining me
I noticed the prestage of a headache within the upper left frontal
cortex.
Had had a concussion once which left damages in the left frontal
cortex, and since that the sequencer seems to do that more;
don't exclude that when the sequencer is having to process too much
parallel  or there is too much of some other stuff, that like me with
the front it needs that upper part for that and it gets too much for
that, and that if I am off-lined and my CPU is not babbling into its
systems, that that is easier for it; but I am not sure if that is the
reason that after the concussion the sequencer seems to off-line me
that much from it.

Also because I don't have power with the front like before for me it
is more difficult to override when its at it, and basically I gave up
on that, unless sometimes when driving a car and I believe that it is
wrong if there I let the sequencer drive the car alone.
Usually it drives the car O.K., but there are times where I really
don't like if it does that and want to know what is going on outside
while driving, too.

So I know the problem from there.

The one with hearing works as long as I do not lose focus. A good load
of adreneline might work far better, but then I need to work a while
on getting that to run.  If I go aggressive to the point that what I
call the third emotion generator goes more active in reaction, though
it spoils my moods, that tends to give me several minutes at least.


.... As I mentioned, one of the places where I do not recall
off-lining repeating stuff like you seem to mention there is in the
woods, and also in the desert.
There the sequencer is not that overcharged with stuff that is too
unnatural for its programs. Nor does there tend to be other stuff too
straining.  I did not pay that much attention to it, but I believe
that some of the highest off-linings are when I am tired and there
were a lot of unnatural signals and maybe other people wanting me to
do stuff that is straining for me, and one of the lowest is about 2
hours after I got up for several hours, and there best in natural
areas.


To interrupt the off-lining when it is running is usually seeming
quite some strain for the systems, and I am not sure if to interfere
with the too much is that good, unless directly trying to get what it
is that is causing the sort of distress and seeing to it going down in
other ways.

But if it are artificial ranges, I do not believe that there is much
to do about them, and that it is lowering the brain tumor risk if the
sequencer is making own energies so that the artificial ones cannot
get too strong. And if it seems to do with not having relaxed systems
in a while and there is not the time for that or I am too impatient
for that, often I might also decide that to battle against the
sequencer about that is not worth it.

Someone I know a bit is also MBD, and we observed that when our
sequencers go for such stuff, often it is parallel.
BTW, if I want to stop him out I often just shortly imitate him  or
tell him that whatever he plucks off himself, to not throw it on my
floor but into the rubbish bin.


 When the child is older the realization might come, too, that it is
wiser to try to rechannel it to ways that normal borns stop getting on
one's nerves about that, and she might get better in deciding who are
good enough friends that one can be the way one is, and who prefer
some actor to play some roles for them.

I might be standing on one leg, the other in one hand, the other hand
being busy with one of my versions of such stuff, and my head nearly
90 degrees turned away from my partner while I am talking to him, and
he might not notice, as he is used to me being weird, and might be
pretty busy following what I am talking about and thinking about it.
If someone would prefer me to look into his eyes and stand on two legs
and act after other's norms, but not care for what I say, I doubt we'd
be friends in the first place.

By the way, there is something we call akasha surfing, which is like
"seeing" together a bit (similar to optical meditation), and if I am
doing that with other brains, usually in that time there is nothing of
such.

... One of my versions was just running (when I stopped after writing
the last stuff) and I tried to ask why, 
and though I am not sure if that is the answer, to me it seemed to be
that it is to blend out ranges of the computer, 
and that I am tired.

The tired is making energies sort of going down, 
and when there is less axon activity 
artificial ranges of this old monitor generate bad energy alterations
in systems in my head easier,
and turning the head in some angle to the monitor and making
repetitive stuff, 
if I were to guess stuff on the left side of the brain is running the
right hand and the right half making patterns there, and that way it
is maybe like a pattern loop, 
that helps to overpower and blend out (more).


If I were you I'd try to rechannel it.
Startle the sequencer out of it, 
imitate the movements so you get the other's own central's attention,
and train another overriding pattern (or several that seem better in
comparison) till the sequencer can run them O.K.,
and try to rechannel.
Eventually a bit of the hardware should change, and then part of it
might be literally rechannelled.

And if I were you I might also let the child play in the woods or some
other natural area very often quite long, and make sure that there are
as little artificial ranges near the sleeping place and also no stuff
down in Earth (water line, "energy line") under the bed that might be
disturbing.

The one with that it happens in sleep sounded odd to me,
unless maybe the child is unnaturally alone in a room.

In the off-lining for me seems normal, but not once the systems
changed far enough for sleep patterns, then for my systems it should
only be there if one of my neighbours goes for terrorizing with
artificial ranges big style.

Also the other with MBD I mentioned: Did not pay that much attention
the few times I was around while he was asleep, but I do not recall
observing such.

The other stuff sounded familiar enough, but with the one in sleep I
did not get why it would be there.

When having awake, and one sort of what many MBD folks have, and
asleep, and they'd be main stages 1,2 and 3 (each with substages),
in 2 it is most often, since the concussion also in 1 quite a bit, but
I did not hear others tell me that it is in sleep, nor noticed it when
getting near sleep or getting out of sleep.

To me for some reason it seems odd that someone'd have it in sleep.

All the rest did not puzzle me, as for me it sounded pretty normal,
but that one sounded odd to me.

The child does not happen to have any guesses about that?
Would interest me.



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