Interview etiquette

[Leemor Joshua-Tor]

Dr. Paula J. Schlax wrote:

>Although it is illegal to ask about marital status, etc., It is clear to
>me that some prospective employers know my marital status and that I
>have kids (presumably from letters of reference or from speaking to
>people who know me). If the prospective employer already knows, but not
>from the prospective employee, are there rules for what can and cannot
>be discussed?
>
>
>
>It isn't a big deal to me- I am not trying to hide my kids or marital
>status-  but it bothers me that it came from another source....
>
>
>
>Just a little peeved today.
>
>
>
>Paula

I understand that you may be a bit annoyed that this was discovered
without you saying anything, but from what I have seen so far, it
is usually to your advantage that your marital status is known.
I would say that perhaps not so much for a first interview but
definately for the second. In several cases, the prospective
employers helped with suggesting options for the spouse and in
one case I was more familiar with, the employer was actually happy
that they could hire both (both are scientists). I realize this last
case is rare, but it wouldn't have happened if they were closed-mouthed
about the situation since they have different last names.

--Leemor


*******************************************************************
  Leemor Joshua-Tor, Ph.D.
  Assistant Investigator
  Keck Structural Biology
  Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory           Tel. (516) 367 8821
  1 Bungtown Road                         Fax  (516) 367 8873
  Cold Spring Harbor, NY 11724            e-mail: leemor at cshl.org
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