In bionet.women-in-bio Karen Lona Allendoerfer <ravena at alumni.princeton.edu> wrote:
: Dierdre Sholto-Douglas wrote:
: >True, as far as it goes, but do you notice the one thing this
: >style of instruction *doesn't* teach? Not to put too fine a
: >point on it, but it doesn't teach the student how to deal with
: >a confrontational situation.
: This is so interesting, and so true. But my question is, does throwing a
: student, unprepared, into a confrontation necessarily teach them any better
: how to deal with the situation? What if the person sinks instead of
: swimming?
Of course not, but I've never advocated tossing them in unprepared...
quite the contrary, in fact. To carry your swimming analogy further,
most folks, when they learn to swim, end up over their heads a few
times. The difference between sinking with supervision and sinking
from lack of instruction is enormous. In the former, one gets hauled
out with a nose full of water and (hopefully) learns how to avoid
doing so again and in the latter, one drowns.
: But some people who *have* been exposed to "trial by fire" have this habit
: as well, and the "fire" makes it worse, not better. Instead of teaching
: anything constructive, it leads to a kind of mild post-traumatic stress
: disorder-like or learned helplessness-like constellation of feelings. I am
: not arguing against your point at all, that neither response does the
: reputation any good. What I am wondering is, whether you have any
: suggestions for those whom the "trial by fire" burns?
I readily admit that I don't find confrontation scary...irritating,
perhaps, but "trial by fire" in the sciences doesn't really bother
me because I was already tempered by the fire I endured at the
hands of the Old Boy Network 20 years previously.
Compared to 400 hide-bound, 30+ years experience brokers and
their troglodyte attitudes (remember, this was the '70's...women
in positions of serious authority weren't all that common and
those that were, weren't in their mid 20's.) the flak I face
in the scientific community seems positively mild and decidedly
civilised. At least (most of the time) the only thing being
questioned is your hypothesis...rather than your personal/sex
life.
Confrontations get easier with time...<chuckle> for a while I
thought people were just becoming wussier, then I realised that
what had changed was not their mode of presentation but my skills
at dealing with them. As an aged crone, I find there's very
little which intimidates me anymore but I arrived at this point
by gritting my teeth, making sure of my facts, ignoring my (very)
thin skin and faking a courage I (at that time) most certainly
did not possess in order to brace an assurance I could not express.
If you find yourself getting flustered or "burned", perhaps what
is needed is someone to practice on prior to the situation. Success
in debate is a learned skill. Find someone to debate (not argue)
with...someone who can be brutal, yet still impersonal and pulling
for you. If not a supervisor, then perhaps a friend in the lab?
Deirdre
--
| Deirdre Sholto-Douglas | e-mail: finch at mcs.com |
| | |
******* The only acceptable substitute for intelligence *******
is silence.
